The Infamouse Stories of the Tudors
by ladyredvelvet
Summary: Helen of the Triad Dragons falls in love with the stories made by various authors. Will her brothers fall in love with them too? A contribution to those who created the lovely reads of Tudor fan fiction.


**Helen and the Books**

**(Off the Wall series)**

A little short story

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Notes: This story is a contribution to all of the Tudor stories I have read. I you find your story on her and prefer it not to be in the story, please tell me and I will take it off.

If your story is not on here and you want me to read and it place in this little crazy story I will. :D (Do not be afraid of me, I do not bite :D)

**Disclaimer: All of the stories I mention have the authors real name next to it! But I will add them at the end of credits in case you did not get it. Also, the characters in this story do not really know the stories (exception of Helen). I am not being critical by any means if you see something that offends you. This is the _characters_ point of view on the story. (Helen's are my comments, I really love the stories so read her lines and you will see the compliments.)**

**Arthur and Flint will be asses in some ways, yet still have their character traits do not worry.**

**Also I will be using their native names, be aware :D.**

**I am not bashing I promise, these the CHARACTERS point of views, this is a dedication to all those beautifully written stories of the Tudors out their. Again, if you do not see your story I will gladly add to this. :D**

**All who read this, check out these fabulous authours and stories I mention.**

-Authors will be in **bold**

-Their stories will be underlined

**If you prefer to have a different name I will gladly put it on their. The Tales of the Tudors Era is not a real story mind you. They are the collection of these novels.**

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They all three sat around a table, laughing and retailing their tales as if nothing in the world would ever come between them.

"William…Poor fellow, his trousers dropped upon stage and he also had an erection which made it worse!"

The three laughed in chorus as Arthur shook his finger.

"I have an even better one, Marion and I were making love.."

Chepi and Nootau purse their lips making a 'ooooo' sound as Arthur quieted them down for being so impudent and immature at times.

"Quiet…We were _cuddling _children, as our momentum built and we were growing anxious. My stomach felt a horrible tug and I let out the hugest, ghastly wind! Marion of course was laughing so hard that we could not continue!"

"We will have to call you 'Your fluctuantcy!" Flint chuckled as he took a dramatic bow to Arthur, he shook his head as he scowled slightly from the crude comment.

"Your highness...You smell awfully like dung, might you wipe your arse please. For the people could use a royal stinch!"

Helen giggled audaciously as Flint joined in, parading around with his hands up as Arthur tripped him along the way.

"Oh Arthur come on now! Take a joke you spoiled pompous!"

Arthur cracked a small smile as he folded his arms. He felt at ease that now they were back together, the triad dragons could finally let loose everything that had come upon their lives during Mary's reign.

All three were older, the twins being nineteen and Arthur being twenty. They each had their own story but had to tell about their humorous tales first. It was a custom when they all met with each other.

"Helen…What about you?" Flint asked as he popped Arthur in the head, the regal poet glared at his brother whose smirk played upon his sharp features bluntly.

"Well…Not really I…Well…Actually I kind of burped in front her majesty…"

The other two let out a chuckle; they knew Helen was not the sort to tell funny stories. She more or less preferred to read about them.

"However, I know we are on the subject of funny stories…I found this very funny one in Nostradamus's library!"

She pulled out a book from under her seat, she had plopped it there earlier after her brothers asked for her to come join them.

Placing it gingerly upon the table, the book was huge and must have contained over one thousand pages.

Arthur gladly opened it first, raising a brow as his now men-loving brother cracked a curious scowl.

"Tales of the Infamous Tudor Era?"

His lime green eyes scanned the table of contents, almost chuckling from what he read. There were stories of all kinds, one's that portrayed their own father with other women and even the wives as well.

"How interesting…What have you read so far…?" He asked quizzically to Helen who beamed happily.

"I have read a lot of them dear brothers, there are still more to come in the direct future…But shall name some that both of you should read!"

Helen gathered the massive book in her hands as she glanced down the list of contents. Her crystal blue eyes never leaving it as she pinpointed each title.

"The Perks of Being a Monarch…Created by **AestheticNarcissist**, she pulls together such a giddy tale of our father! It makes him sound so humane, I hated how these silly rumors run about the castle that he was such a tyrant…He was only looking for love…"

Both boys glanced at each other curiously, they have never heard of such a name nor a story. Their unique shade of eyes glanced down at the book's golden hard cover.

"What an unusual name for an author…" Replied Arthur who grasped the book away from Helen as Flint leaned up against the wall.

"Sounds interesting…Though you know dear sister, I read plays more than I do stories…"

Helen's eyes mischievously gleam, for she knew that her brother was more interested in men and decided to open her mouth and say it.

"It does have little quips of man love in there…" She replied coolly, Flint scoffed at the idea, slightly interested, but he still was the dominant male between his relationship with William.

Arthur chuckled as he read through the pages of this unique story. He was quite intrigued how the author put together his father in such a celebrative way. Yet he almost felt appalled as he read a sexual scene with his father and Kathrine of Aragon horrid images entered his mind as he passed through the pages.

"I am sorry Helen, but how do you read those passages with…Father making love to another woman?"

Arthur made a gag face as Helen chuckled at her brother's lack of imagination.

"You of all people Arthur should know that imagination is the key to not looking at the reality…" Little Chepi advised her poetry brother Kiziz.

"Well it is quite funny, but I am not like you Helen who could imagine away things…" Though Arthur could not help but read a bit more of the part where his father banged his head against the wall and was knocked out unconscious practically.

"But I must give it to father, he is quite the frisky fellow…"

Arthur flipped another page, glancing at the title and tilted his head.

"Le Mie Prigioni? By **Sacchen**…zero..Nine? Is there more of this person? Hurmmm…Oh…This is a story Flint would desire to read…"

Arthur chuckled as Flint's violet eyes glared at his teasing brother.

"Why do you say that…?" He replied in utter disgust, he disliked how his brother made fun of his sexuality. He was proud, yet he kept it secret at times.

"Read for yourself.." Arthur suggested as Flint deliberately took the book by force, skimming the passages as he blushed himself silly.

"Oh Flint the story is quite dramatic. It is sweet and yet beautiful all the same.."

Flint could not leave the pages, he skimmed through it fast. His violet eyes following each word precisely, his whole world shattered because these two star crossed lovers could never be together.

"Why is George going to be executed…" His brow furrowed as if it was Helen's fault for saying anything.

"I am not sure…In history he does get executed because they thought he was messing around with the mysterious Anne Boleyn…" She replied softly, Flint shook his head from the horrid rage that he felt. How could people execute others just because they did nothing wrong? War was unlike that; he knew they had to be killed, but everyday life? It was ludicrous.

"Here is another story.." Replied Flint as he tried to soften the mood.

"Treason by Parentage…The first edition? By…**Darkvampirewitch**, how interesting…"

He handed the book gently back upon the table as Helen flipped through the pages with a huge smile upon her face.

"This story is quite captivating actually, if Katherine of Aragon was the mother of Henry, what would happen in the court? There is also a second edition that it is almost complete, I will get it as soon as it is out upon the market place!"

Helen ecstatically replied as Arthur folded his arms in question.

"Wait…Katherine of Aragon is Queen yes, but she was married to Henry…That is impossible.."

Chepi sighed heavily, her brother Arthur was such a realist sometimes that she could not figure out how he wrote his beautiful vivid poetry.

"Listen dear brother, this is fiction and non fiction, a mix between the two. Katherine of Aragon falls in love with the Chancellor Thomas More and they both have our father Henry, the rest of it is true when Henry falls for the indescribable Anne Boleyn…It is wonderfully put together and even has a poem and song intertwined with it…"

Flint read over her shoulder as his eyes grew wide, the mentioning of a war perked his interests as he grabbed the book without hesitation.

"The Battle of Flodden! I must read this…" His violet eyes ate up everything, but as soon as the two chapters of the book were finished, he almost felt at home. Yet to his dismay, the battle was short lived and he slammed it back down upon the table.

"Why do they not write more battle scenes! It is way to romantic for my taste…"

He replied crudely, as Helen shook her head and skimmed through the pages.

"Oh but that is what makes a story Flint, like a dramatic piece, there is always romance in it. No matter how small, love makes the world go round. I just hope that Katherine and Thomas More end up together again…"

She replied with sigh as she flipped to the next story. The two watched amazed, their sister was not the most brilliant, but her reading skills were wonderful as she read aloud the next piece of stunning work.

"The Queen by l**emondropseverus**…" She replied in a mysterious voice as she flipped through the chapters.

"What if Henry, our father the King, was to fall in love with the princess of Quadrilater…What will happen to Anne Boleyn? Or Katherine of Aragon…Oh it is most wonderful!"

Again Arthur shook his head, he could not believe these people pairing his father with such odd entities that he had never heard of.

"Why this is imaginative shit Helen! You cannot put odd people with our father…"

Helen shook her head, giggling for Arthur was contradicting himself.

"Mother was never supposed to be with him.." She replied coolly, Arthur could not say anything to that as he sighed heavily.

"I guess you are right…However, why do these authors go under such unusual names?"

Helen petite shoulders shrugged as she smiled with glee.

"They keep their identities hidden so people will not come bashing at their door. Their popularity would equal far greater than the King himself.."

She pointed out happily as she hugged the book to her chest.

"I really do like this character Kat, she is different, and will show Henry that she can do anything a man can do."

Flint scoffed at this but Helen came back with a retort.

"Flint you are only _half _a man…"

His tan skin reflected off a poisonous anger, his sister never really snapped at him so this was something quite new.

"I shall read that later…Find another.."

Helen's blue orbs glanced through the pages, each corn silk paper licked her fingers gingerly as she came upon a few that molded in together.

"**Darkvampirewitch** published these in honors of the Queens, they are obituaries and their thoughts before they died…"

Helen felt a glumness fall upon her diminutive frame. These Queens of her father had suffered so much, and during their reign, they each had held their own demise.

"Sounds actual…I like it…" Arthur thought, but yet he felt bad for saying such vindictive words to the other stories and he added "and I will read the other 'fictitious' ones as well.."

A smile played upon her olive features as she skimmed through some more. She than found one that seemed so interesting, it had a song in between and different first person thoughts of two people.

"Snow White Queen by **Green Eyes Mesmerized…**It is a perfect blend of beauty and love…For our father was after Anne and wanted her so much that he would buy her jewels and such. Persuading her, but Anne only wanted to be Queen..She died before mother ever came ashore…"

The two boys glanced at each other once again as Flint turned his head towards Helen rapidly.

"So these two Queen's Anne Boleyn and Katherine of Aragon, they are seen a lot in these stories…What was so interesting about _them_?"

It was now Helen's turn to give out interesting information.

"Well you see dear brothers, they have a more known past than the other four Henry married. For they loved the King very much, but yet to their dismay…Came a fall, Katherine grew ill, she is the mother of the former Queen Mary…" They all shuttered as they heard the name read from their sister's lips.

"And Anne was cunning, and knew how to work the court with ease. A commoner made into a Queen…"

Chepi felt almost proud as her two half-Native brothers felt in awe at their sister's intelligence.

"The next story is called Never in my Wildest Dreams by **Lady of Romance**.."

"There is a catchy alias name…" Flint quipped sarcastically as Helen glared at him.

"I think it is beautiful, anyway…This story is about Jane Seymour's adoptive friend and sister Katrina who falls for Jane's husband our infamous father Henry…"

She held the story close, it was yet another who told fact from fiction. Agreeing with the vivid language and the way each character was describe lusted Helen more to read.

"Why are all of these about the wives and our father? Why can they not be about Arthur the first or Henry the seventh or Mary Queen of Scots.."

Flint asked curiously, but Helen shook her head.

"Our father is way more interesting than you think, remember Oda Duban, mother, telling us that Henry had six wives and beheaded two of them? His lust for these ladies was indescribable, and these authors have hit the nail upon his personality."

"I am more interested in a war than anything.." Flint replied half lying, yet he did want to read more on George Boleyn's letters to the man he would never see again….

"Oh quiet Flint, I know deep down inside you want to read more sexual stories of men.." Arthur chimed in as he placed his long fingers upon Helen's book and pushed it towards him. Flint had forgotten that they had a odd telepathic tie to one another.

"The story of Henry the VIII and Anne Boleyn… created by **scaryand damaged**…Elizabeth our Queen is in here!"

Arthur replied ecstatically as he flipped through the pages, Flint looked over for he was glad that their good found friend has finally become Queen.

"Wait…Charles Brandon is dead…"

Helen felt so lost with her brothers, she thought with so many experiences with writing and dramatic plays that they would be more attuned to their inventive side.

"Do you not see that they are all fictitious to some extent! The writers want it this way, this is what pulls the readers in so that they will read more of the story you fools!"

Her petite hands forcefully pulled the book towards her, reading allowed one more story so that her brothers would stop being such idiots about the literature she had found.

"To These words I Behold No Tongue by** Anne Becker**…Such a beautiful tale of the Buckingham's daughter…Remember, the man betrayed Henry and the daughter had made love with Charles Brandon? Well this is a twist you soon will want to devour more!"

Helen had a way with words, for her brothers immediately started to laugh as she frowned at them.

"Fine, you call can be such arses sometimes! I will never share my stories again!"

The brothers laughed again as she exited the ornate room that they met in. She hated the fact they never appreciated the stories, she loved them all, each and every one of them.

She walked down the silent halls, skimming a new one called The Queen's Whore? By **magicswnymor**… She loved how the words were so vividly intertwined with Anne's feelings of the new court…She could not help but continue. Faint foot steps echoed amongst the Greenwich palace, she did not even bother to look up for she thought it was her brothers coming back to say sorry.

"I had heard your book was unappreciated…" A soft voice made of velvet asked gingerly, Helen gasped as she eyed her beautiful mother who barley aged. She wore a red dress that hugged her hips nicely, red lips pursed into a smile while she sat elegantly down next to her bewildered daughter.

"Little Chepi…You should not worry about what your brothers think. They are more into their own art…This my dear…Is your own.."

Helen smiled dearly at her mother, she knew so much compared to the rest. She was beyond her years as Helen leaned her head upon her mother's narrow shoulder. Chepi's black locks spilling on to Rosa's chest as she placed her head upon her daughter's head. An embrace that Helen loved the most.

"Mother…Will someone ever write a story about you? I mean…All these stories have to be true, I would love to meet the Princess of Quadrilater, and Katrina, and Anne Boleyn I know I wont be able to but the others..Willn't I?"

Rosa smiled lovingly towards her beautiful daughter; she shined like the brightest diamond in the rough. Her frail fingers placed a wavy black lock of her Chepi's behind her ear as she kissed her head lightly.

"Maybe…Goodnight my fairy, I love you." She than got up from her place upon the stone seat, she walked regally down the glass of floors as Helen held the book closely to her.

"I love you as well mother.." She replied softly, as she stood up from her seat. A herd of clopping noises clapped against the floor as the two brothers came out and hugged their sister.

"Just like Duben said, we love our own thing while you love your fantasy books." Arthur replied with a smile as he than lifted his lime green gaze to a woman in green residing to her chambers. Her angelic face beamed brightly at her lover and his family as she than turned to face the door. Her yellow hair grazing her glowing pale shoulders.

"Now if you will excuse me you two, our meeting is adjourned..I must see Marion for the night…"

Flint smiled coyly as he gave a graceful bow.

"Sir Fluctuance be weary of your mighty winds of smell!" He called out as Arthur turned around and called out.

"Be protective of your groin for I might cut it off in the night…Than you will see if your lover will ever get an erection!"

He replied playfully as Flint shook his head at his brother's silly comment.

"To much a due dear sister, I must meet William for a…_private_…Rehearsal…"

He left quickly down the hall as Helen stood alone, her olive face basking in the moon as she held the book close.

"I will create mother's biography…And Our own…" She smiled to herself as she left down the hall. Wanting to get started on her new project upon her mother's violent past, her beautiful mother, The Savage Queen…

* * *

Notes:

**Credits**

**AestheticNarcissist: The Perks of Being a Monarch**

**sacchen09: Le Mie Prigioni**

**Darkvampirewitch: Treason By Parentage I and II, and also her stories of the Queen's death's**

**lemondropseverus: The Queen**

**Green Eyes Mesmerized: Snow White Queen**

**Lady of Romance: Never in my Wildest Dreams**

**scaryand damaged: The story of Henry the VIII and Anne Boleyn**

**Anne Becker: To These Words I Behold No Tongue**

**magicswnymor: The Queen's Whore?**

**Again, if you do not want your story on here I will take it off. Also I was not at all bashing stories, I love them all so much that is why I made a contribution to all of them! XD. Be weary of Arthur's and Flint's comments, it is their reactions and their own, they are silly boys who cannot imagine things like Helen could. (Of course they secretly like the stories they will not at first admit it ;D)**

**I hope you enjoyed it, if you do not like this at all I will take it down. The characters speaking are my own, Marion is created by _Darkvampirewitch _**

**Read these stories, they are wonderful as ever, and if you want your's added drop me an e-mail of some sort. Enjoy loves :D.**

**SORRY FOR GRAMMATICAL ERRORS! I did fix them :D**


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